4.26.2006
| sleeping at work |

Im so sleepy today. im currently fighting the urge to simply bow my head on my desk and doze off. I think I need another cup of coffee. though i set a limit of one cup of coffee a day (para mabawasan ang pagiging nerbyosa), there were always instances when you have to bend the rule a little.

I'm a self confessed coffee addict. My day wont be complete if I wont be able to drink a cup. I actually feel weird if no caffein enters my body within 24 hours. And I'll eventually start longing for a hot cup. My ultimate weakness is a hot grande cafe late from starbucks or a boiling kettle of native batangas cofee that my lola perfectly brews each morning when im home. I could drink a drum of those and be happy and contented my whole life. That's how sick and addicted I am to beans.

My eyes are heavy and Im starting to give in to the tempatation... a short nap.I want to sleep. My room is calling me and I want to run home and jump into bed. I feel like dreaming. I feel like nothing is real. Ooooppps, you might get the wrong idea, hindi po ako nagddrugs. :P puyat lang talaga. I did not have a nice peaceful sleep (the usual) last night because I'm too worried.I keep on looking at my cellphone, fearing that there might be a message from anyone in the hospital. I couldn't help but cry when I saw my lola at the ICU. Her condition seems so terrible, her body is lifeless, and obviously, she's sufferring a lot. i hope she'd recover.She's a strong woman and a fighter. I really hope she'd be okay. Sorry if I keep on lamenting these emotions here. The last posts are all remorseful and I hate giving problems and negative aura to the people reading this blog, however, it helps me a lot. I write about how I feel especially when I'm worried.It's relaxing and it helps me cope up with things whenever I feel gloomy. I just have to let it all out.


We're planning to go to Puerto Galera this weekend. My mom said that I shouldn't go given the current family crisis. I insisted, saying that i need the rest and I wouldn't be able to do anything, anyway. But the decision still depends on how my lola's condition would be. I know Junjun would be greatly disappointed if this would be postponed too, but given the current circumstances, what am i to do? Still, Im trying to think positively. Everything would be okay. It should be.

I'm hearing lullabyes in my head. Owh... I really want to take a nap. just a short one. Gotta go get that coffee...

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 2:11 PM

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