12.29.2005

| the last working day of the year whoohooh! |



happy birthday to my most favorite person in the whole world. thanks for being who you are.
---
we were at the world pyroolympics last night at the Esplanade. I was really excited, i love fireworks - always thought of them as hundreds of fireflies falling off from the sky when i was a kid. It was breathtakingly amazing. The 20 minute and so fireworks display accompanied by the ooohsss and aaahhhss of the crowd was worth the long walk and the long wait and all the pleas till i finally got jun to agree to go. We had only watched one part, Russian Federation's and it was amazing. I just wish that the sky would be as colorful on new year's eve (good luck). It must have cost a million to prepare such an event.


As kate said, "because everyone's doing it.". here's mine:


The year-end survey

What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before?
shop like crazy and charge everything to visa. that night, i thought im gonna be sick. i mean, i couldn't believe it happened.

Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
i dont remember what my new year's resolution was. so this year, im not making one.


Did anyone close to you give birth?
nope. my friend rona is on her 9th month of pregnancy though.

What countries did you visit?
none. though now im thinking, when will i be able to?

What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
a stable job

What date from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
december 2. someone will probably understand why. :)

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
being completely independent; learning to be kuripot

What was your biggest failure?
leaving a job that i love for another job that proves to be impossibly idle.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
nope. surprisingly, i only got a flu once and that's it.

What was the best thing you bought?
The 10 season of Friends DVDs i started collecting and junjun finished.

Whose behavior merited celebration?
si daps. he almost always never thinks of himself. im always amazed of what a wonderful person he is.

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
someone. i hate his guts.

Where did most of your money go?
bills. my younger brother's allowance.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
so many things. most of which, with junjun.

What song(s) will always remind you of 2005?
MYMP revivals, all those Cueshale (Cueshe+Hale) songs, all of Halina sa Parokya songs by Parokya ni Edgar

Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? -- Happier.
ii. thinner or fatter? -- Fatter. :-( i must do something about it. ;)
iii. richer or poorer? -- Richer.

What do you wish you'd done more?
i really dont know. maybe, having fun moments with friends at my present job. im growing to be a loner. maybe it has something to do with being depress of having nothing to do. (sounds redundant). this is a different kind of stress. something that roots from a lot of nothingness 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. mahirap magpanggap.

What do you wish you'd done less of?
being alone with myself specially at the office.
How many one-night stands?
None.

What was your favorite TV program?
i didn't get to watch t.v. a lot this year. although, i also got hooked on pinoy big brother. and c.s.i. i also love this year's fad, koreanovelas. loved save the last dance for me, lovers in paris and chunyang. :)

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
yes i do. but then, i only knew him this year.

What was the best book you read?
the prince and the pauper, the little prince,jonathan livingston seagull and the chronicles of Narnia. (i had only read the first of the series so far. i hope to finish it all soon.)

What was your greatest musical discovery?
hmm...not that into music

What did you want and get?
harry potter book 6. it was a dream to get it on the day of its world wide release. my prince made it come true.

What was your favorite film of this year?
mr. and mrs. smith. why? i dont know, maybe because i love beatiful people killing each other... hahaha.

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
23. i was with junjun. nothing big. we just dined out and my friends from my previous work "surprised"-ly showed up with gifts and all. and yeah, i brought 4 dozens of gonuts-donuts at the office.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
im happy for everything that happened so far.aha, i know. a more fulfilling job.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
being the anti-fashion person that i am, i think i made a progress this year. thanks to my sistahs (aby and she) and to my ever loving and ultimate sponsor (jun) , im not that much of a tshirt with anything goes girl that i was.

What kept you sane?
jun

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Phoebe Buffay. She is so carefree. She can say what she thinks however weird it is. I admire her fashion sense. She is crazy yet everyone loves her for being crazy.

What political issue stirred you the most?
i hate politics. period.

Who did you miss?
my lola and lolo. i didnt have much time to go to the province much.

Who was the best new person you met?
a lot of people. among them, ancar, my former officemate whom i got to be really close this past few months because of our similarities (read: relationship insecurities). inay, also a former officemate. i love her, her crazy stories about her life, her all-smile face, and her motherly love! hahahah. peace tayo inay. gigi, my new-found friend slash officemate slash seatmate slash teamate. we share the same angst and dilemmas. jackie, a very thoughtful friend with the same sentiments about clothes, height, jeans, make ups as mine. racs, my lunchmate and dear friend and kasama kung saan saan. the barkads here at the office namely syel, baja, carol, chelai, patchu, kuya romy, larry, jerome, jeff... they accepted me to their group with open arms. im glad to have found them.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005:
1) God knows what's best
2) Loving someone with all your heart is the greatest feeling there is. But being loved by that someone surpass everything else.
3) To everything there is a reason.
4) Sometimes, you'll get tired of waiting.
5) "One runs the risk of weeping a little if he lets himself be tamed" the little prince

What was the nicest thing someone told you:
"you are the cuteness reincarnated" - jun
"mahirap ang buhay pero ang buhay masaya kapag may kaibigang kasama"(or something to that effect) - mabel
"salamat sa pagpapagalit, it keeps me sane" - she
"hindi ka na mukhang bangag" - ramil serrano

What did you like most about yourself this year?
less of a worry freak; mejo nabawasan na rin ang pagiging afraid of things happening for the first time.

What did you hate most about yourself this year?
not being able to control myself sometimes

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
eto sakto:
"Huwag kang matakot na matulog mag-isa Kasama mo naman ako Huwag kang matakot na umibig at lumuha Kasama mo naman ako Huwag kang matakot Huwag kang matakot Dahil ang buhay mo’y walang katapusan Makapangyarihan ang pag-ibig Na hawak mo sa iyong kamay Ikaw ang Diyos at hari ng iyong mundo Matakot sila sa ‘yo"
(yikes naiiyak ako...hehehe)

Was 2005 a good year for you?
yes. despite some anxieties here and there, i can say i was blessed.

What was your favorite moment of the year?
walking, going everywhere with jun. then having all the kakulitans on the way there.

What was your least favorite moment of the year?
sa work: this last three months. parang nabobobo na ko dahil sa trabaho. darn!
sa bahay: was it august? when my mom was always negating my relationship with jun.

Where were you when 2005 began?
Batangas
Who were you with?
with my family

Where will you be when 2005 ends?
Batangas

Who will you be with when 2005 ends?
with my family

Do you have a new years resolution for 2006?
as ive said, i wont make any. i tend to forget it.

What was your favorite month of 2005?
December.

Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005?
nope.

Did you miss anybody in the past year?
yes. corny as it sounds, i always miss jun when we are not together. yeah, smile as silly as you want. all i can say is, it's true.

What was your favorite record from 2005?
halina sa parokya - parokya ni edgar
ultraelectromagnetic jam - eraserheads

How many concerts did you see in 2005?
none. not really into it.

Did you drink a lot of alchohol in 2005?
yes. with mabel.we had a lot of alcohol trips. i finally learned to drink san mig light. always with a soda. and with aby one time. i nver got drunk, not even once though.

Do a lot of drugs in 2005?
no.

You do anything you are ashamed of this year?
i think yes.

How much money did you spend in 2005?
a lot. some figure which would definitely make my head ache when i finally am able to sum it all up.

What was your proudest moment of 2005?
being offered a position in my previous company despite the fact that they know that im leaving.

If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 and change something, what would it be?
its a secret.

What are your plans for 2006?
initiate changes

How are you different now that the year has ended?
workwise, im fighting the urge and the frustrations.

What are your wishes for the new year?
for everyone i love to be happy.

12.27.2005

| christmas '05 |

“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons.
It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags.
And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before.
What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store.
What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”

- Dr. Seuss

12.16.2005

| the day of gift giving and the beginning of weekend getaway |


INTRO
Huwag kang matakot‘
Di mo ba alam nandito lang ako
Sa iyong tabi‘
Di kita pababayaan kailanman
At kung ikaw ay mahulog sa bangin
Ay sasaluhin kita

CHORUS
Huwag kang matakot na matulog mag-isa
Kasama mo naman ako
Huwag kang matakot na umibig at lumuha
Kasama mo naman ako
Huwag kang matakot
Huwag kang matakot
Dahil ang buhay mo’y walang katapusan
Makapangyarihan ang pag-ibig
Na hawak mo sa iyong kamay
Ikaw ang Diyos at hari ng iyong mundo
Matakot sila sa ‘yo
[Repeat CHORUS 1 except last line]
CHORUS 2
Huwag kang matakot na magmukhang tanga
Kasama mo naman ako
Huwag kang matakot sa hindi mo pa makita
Kasama mo naman ako
Huwag kang matakot
Aahhhah
[Repeat CHORUS 1]
Huwag kang matakot (huwag kang matakot)‘
Di kita pababayaan kailanman
[Repeat till fade]
(The Music of Eraserheads "UltraElectroMagnetic Jam" rocks. thanks to khyrone for the cd.)

12.06.2005

| the day when i dont really care |



i love Pom poko

I was at Metrowalk last night to return a DVD we bought, "The Rock". I was not really looking for anything in particular to buy for myself since I’m trying to cut my expenses due to the fact that it is barely 3 weeks to go before Christmas. (the season comes with all kinds of spending and gift giving). So I was there, browsing thru stall 10E’s DVD titles looking for the movie list misyel asked me to buy for her. I love the stands at metro walk since they have old movies in very good quality and very affordable prices to choose from. After my job is done, I roamed around some more till I found a stall of interesting Korean movies. There, I discovered Studio Gibli and Ms Cathy, the storelady who amazingly knew what she is selling.

So that’s how, two hours after, I was watching Pom-poko, a Japanese cartoon movie (think Disney flicks only from Japan) about raccoons or Tanukis. Pom-poko is produced by Studio Ghibli and directed by Isao Takahata,one of Japan's greatest anime director. Pompoko, as I have discovered from Google and Nausicaa, is Japan's submission for the 1995 foreign-language Oscar. This movie is different for me, meaning, I don’t have any expectation and I haven’t read any good reviews, plus no friend of mine claimed it is good, heck, i dont even understand a word written on the cover-in other words, i have no idea what i had until i pressed the Play button. However, after a few minutes on the screen… I became fascinated by the movie’s plot. It was entertaining and sometimes hilarious yet politically metaphoric.






The story is about a clan of Tanukis or raccoons living in a large empty house that used to belong to humans. Initially, they were delighted to inhabit their find however, they found out later why the house is empty… nearby a construction development site is underway. Forced to live with limited resources, the Tanukis fought with each other for survival. However, an older Tanuki, proclaimed that fighting will not solve their problem and that they have to think of a way on how to stop the construction that man has begun. The next scenes deal with the strategies that the Tanukis learned. The have the capability to transform into another thing or even as a human and the young Tanukis were taught on the proper way to do this. Most of the tricks they learned and do are hilariously funny. They go on scaring humans by pretending to be ghosts and pretending to be spirits of the deities until one human-transformed wolf talked to them about living as humans do. The Tanukis, taking his advice, learned to live as humans do.

This is a really good film. Unlike your typical disney movies, the story is never dragging nor is it too fantasized. " Pom Poko" narrates the plot of environmental conservation issues with humor and wisdom. This is a good film to watch and certainly, I’ll be hunting for Studio Ghibli film more from now on.

---

did i really say in one my previous post that i got tired of lurking at peyups? well, i take it all back. id like to say thanks to peyups and all the great people there for keeping me sane during this i-hate-the-fact-that-i- have-nothing-to-do month. i have visited every single forum (except for sex and intimacy which is locked, you know) and found really interesting topics. My profile had even been promoted to the next level. Can you believe that's how engrossed I am? I compiled the lines below from the words to live by thread. I think I have to read and reread these stuff for the words to sink in.

1.Contentment is not fulfillment of what you wish but the appreciation of what you have.
2.Fight the fight that needs fighting, and not because you can win.
3.Put yourself in the other guy's shoes.
4.HAPPINESS is a state of mind.
5.LIFE is all about risks and it requires you to jump!
6.Everything happens for a reason.
7.Fate does not seek our consent
8.Life sucks... deal with it.
9.The saddest part of life is when you start seeing the bigger picture.
10.Don't screw up the best thing that ever happened to you just because you're a little unsure about who you are
11.Anyone who angers you, conquers you.
12.One broken dream is not the end of dreaming.
13.Most men fail through lack of purpose
14.You can't have everything.
15.His will is more powerful than yours.
16.Look at the little things you have in your life and make the most out of them.

12.01.2005

| the day with the webinar |


being invisible

No one can see me. They can walk right through me and they’ll never know what hit them. (or if something did hit). I could watch them from a distance, they wont get the uncomfortable feeling of being stared at. I could monitor their activities, gawk over their shoulders without risking the chance of getting caught. I could do whatever I want to, daring the naughtiest of thing I could ever think of. And no one would care.

But despite the thrill of living my life as I wish without the agony of morality trailing behind my back, I’d be incomplete. Like a body searching its soul. Like a Juliet waiting in vain for her Romeo. I have the capacity to see the beauty surrounding my existence. But no one to share it with. I would have the ears to listen to the pleas of misery. But no capacity to make a difference. I would have the immortal power any person would be crazy to have. But what good would it be?
_ _ _
just a thought: "love makes the wildest spirit tame and the tamest spirit wild"
_ _ _



Patti LaBelle & Joss Stone's
(from chicken little)



"I can't sit here while I go nowhere
Chase my dreams through the polluted air
Walking on a wire, running out of time
There's no room in this ol' heart of mine
Bill collectors waiting down the hall
Neighbors scream and crack the bedroom wall
Nerves jump off the pavement, passion hits the street
Angels cookin' in the city heat
World's too crazy, I can't take no more
I won't stay here locked behind the door
Baby, stir it up, got to break it up now
When I think about tomorrow, ooh, I can't wait to
Stir it, got to shake it up now
If I have to beg or borrow, I'm not gonna take it anymore,
mmm, mmm
Hungry minds do stare you in the eyes
Spread it thick and lay the biggest lies
Don't say what you feel, must play hard to get
All those time bombs tickin' in your head
So much pressure to keep holdin' on
Pack my clothes up, baby, I'll be gone
I've got to stir it up, got to break it up now..."

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