7.22.2005
| the day when i miss him terribly |


article originally written last: 10/11/04, 08:50am







but then i want you exactly the way you are

If you were a cartoon character
You'd be Dexter
All-knowing and smart yet lovable and adorable.

If you were a coffee
you'd be caramel frappuccino
ice-cold, smooth and delicious yet a pocket burner.

If you were a chocolate
You'd be Black Meiji
Bitter yet sweet.

If you were a drink
You'd be a Vodka
You come in different flavors yet each one is addictive.

If you were a reality tv show
You'd be Amazing Race
Adventurous, thrilling and exciting yet breathtakingly wild.

If you were a movie,
You'd be My Sassy Girl
Irritatingly funny at the beginning yet mellow and romantic as the film rolls.

If you were an animal,
You'd be a Lion
Arrogant yet hilariously shy.

If you were a sport
You'd be hang-gliding
Adrenaline-rush all throughout yet relaxing

If you were a stone
You'd be a diamond
Hard and unbreakable yet forever enchanting.

If you were a heavenly body
You'd be the sun
... you are the closest star to me
... my source of energy
...without you I shall not live
...complex, yet you are the world for me.

the center of my universe.

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 11:48 AM | 1 comments


| Repost - Ang Labo Mo |



Ang Labo Mo...
article created last: 03/31/04 : 0839am

Ang labo mo.

Ang labo. Yan ang generic na comments ng mga friends ko kapag nagkkwento ako ng tungkol sa yo. Yan din ang buntong hininga ko kapag naiisip kita. At yan din ang himutok ko sa kung ano mang bagay sa kalawakan na meron tayo ngayon.

Kapag tinitingnan kita sa mata, nalulula ako. Kapag magkasama tayo, konting friction lang, nagiiba ang pakiramdam ko. Kapag di kita nakita or nakausap or naitext, hindi ako mapakali. At sa oras oras na ginawa ni God, naiisip kita. I was kind of hesitant to admit it at first, kasi hindi ako sanay ng nagkakaganito. And to be vocal about it...naku, kung alam mo lang kung gaano kahirap yun sa part ko. I grew up in a family where feelings are not something that you can discuss over dinner. Kaya malihim ako lalo na kung tungkol sa mga nararamdaman ko. Pero syempre, lahat yun nakalimutan ko nung nagsimula ang dilemma ko tungkol sa yo.

Di ka naman sweet eh. Walang konsepto ng pagiging romantic na nananalaytay sa laman mo, sure ako dun. Pero kapag magkasama tayo, feeling ko ang special ko. Eh sundin mo ba naman lahat ng gusto ko eh. Yung tipong even the smallest details gusto mo mapagbigyan mo ko? Minsan nga kahit di mo trip yung movies na gusto ko, nagppretend ka na lang na excited eh.Di ka magaling magpanggap kaya alam ko. One time nga magkahawak tayo ng kamay sa movie, nararamdaman ko talaga na mahal mo ko. Kaya all throughout, naka-smile ako. Hindi mo nga lang siguro nakita kasi madilim and of course, you're supposed to look at the screen. Yung mga night walks natin, yun yung best part para sa akin. Feeling ko ang payapa. As in I feel so secured with you, minsan ayoko ng makita ka kapag maghihiwalay tayo. Kasi nasasaktan ako na natapos na yung ilang oras na kasama kita. And then I'll start counting the hours and days and sometimes weeks kung kelan ulit kita makakasama. Yah, I know, adik na ata ako sa yo eh.

And dont worry alam kong mahal mo ko. Nararamdaman ko na totoo, in your own special way you make me feel cared for and loved. Love din kita, and dont worry, tanggap ko kung sino ka ang lahat lahat ng tungkol sa yo. Kaya kahit na mushy ako at sentimental at kahit na mas gusto yung sweet and thoughtful, i fully understand kung hindi ko masyadong makita sa yo yun. Believe me, you have taught me how to appreciate the simple things na ginagawa mo.

Sana lagi na lang ganito. Sana yung mga magical moments, hindi mawala at hindi natin pagsawaan. Sana yung mga ngiti sa labi at kislap sa mata na nagraradiate kapag magkausap tayo, hindi kumupas.

Sana alam mo na ganito ang nararamdaman ko. At sana rin alam ko kung ano ang nasa isip mo.

Ano ba talaga, tayo ba o imagination ko lang lahat ito? Ang labo di ba?

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 11:39 AM | 0 comments


7.21.2005
| the day with the last song syndrome |

can't get it out of my mind. so might as well post it here. same old same old. still bored. i miss him. sobra

"Sige"
( by 6 CYCLE MIND )
Sige, pag kasama ka naman,
Kitang-kita ko ang ating kasiyahan
Sige, wag na nating pigilan
At di magtatagal, tayo ay liligaya

Okey lang naman ang ating usapan
Hindi na lang babalikan ang nakaraan
Ang nakaraan

Ayos lang, basta't kasama
Konting alak lang, Kahit walang pulutan
Ang minsan, naaalala
Di magtatagal, tayo ay liligaya

Sige, pagpatuloy niyo lang
Unti-unting lunudin sa kasiyahan
Sige, pagpasensiyahan na lang
Mga pumipigil sa ating ligaya

Okey lang naman ang ating usapan
Hindi na lang babalikan ang nakaraan
Ang nakaraan

Ayos lang, basta't kasama
Konting alak lang, Kahit walang pulutan
Ang minsan, naaalala
Di magtatagal, tayo ay liligaya

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 11:44 AM | 0 comments


7.20.2005
| the day when i have nothing else to do |




on the pain of boredom

You might have noticed that I've been updating this blog like crazy since it's birth on July 18. Haha! Believe it or not, I have nothing else to do but think of something to spice this webblog. I am so bored. Evidently.

I visited eyen's site two days ago, I discovered it by pretty much guessing. And I found something cool. She has a page with all of her special friends's close up pictures. That's why I added "the profiler" (btw, thanks eyen!). Now I have to look for appropriate pictures of my closest bud... That's something that I could do for half a day. Yeah, there's friendster. But knowing my being oc when it comes to photos... Now you see how bored I am?

Hay, I dont intend to spend the rest of this month bumming around. God, I have no idea that this is so difficult.

on harry potter and the spoilers

Having nothing else to do, I resolved into reading the softcopy of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince as well. At first I successfully resist the urge to do so, thinking that it would be too inconsiderate. But after learning that I, indeed, am suppose to do nothing else but wait for the day's end, I decided to go on and read the remaining chapters. After all, even closing my eyes and blocking my ears with my hands... proved to be useless in keeping the spoilers out of my system.

It's good. It's one of the best books in the series so far and I love it. I want to savor it to the last drop (geek!). I can't tell you how grateful I am that jun jun gave me a copy on the release date. Up to now, I am mesmerized with the fact that I have the book on my hands at night (yes, that's how much of an addict I am). If it were my decision, I'd rather not buy it, however badly I want the book. Masyado akong kuripot to spare the thousand bucks. But now, I'm just thankful that he gave me the pleasure of being one of the first to have it...Really.

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 11:38 AM | 0 comments


| the day with the whole mystery of mapping |



After talking to Sir Hans, we came to a conclusion that we are indeed moving to the mapping team in August.
This could be an adventure. I have no idea whatsoever about what mapping is about. It could be fun to learn something entirely new. That way, I wont bore myself uploading photos and videos each and everytime of the day. And the best part of it (the one that gets me hopeful instead of reproachful),its a temporary project assignment. If that is really the case, then I guess it would be a gud move. There's nothing to loose and in return, I'll learn stuff...

Actually, when you look at it, this transfer is a bit overwhelming. I would prefer to stay with performance longer before engaging in another project. That way, I had my hands first on the specifics of our team's project before leaping into something new. But since it just happened all of a sudden, I just have to accept the fact that I have to go. And look forward to the possiblities of doing maps.
To give you an idea of what the heck I am talking about... Jackie defined mapping as "the art of mopping the floor" I had laughed my stomach out!!

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 11:17 AM | 0 comments


| the day i got it straight |


Pagising ko kaninang umaga... nawala sa isip ko. So derecho lang ako sa ordinary routine. Tumunog ang alarm clock ng 545. Pero knowing na meron pa kong 15 minutes... pumikit ulit ako. Tumunog ulit ang alarm ng 6. Despite my whole body's protest, naglakad ako papuntang sofa. Pumikit. Nagpanggap na tulog. Kumuha ng towel. Nung mapadaan ako sa salamin, whoaaah! something's change. hehehe. It's the hair. Yep...got it fixed last night. My hair has been a bother for a while now and when abby ask if i want to go with her to get our hairs done... di na ko nagdalawang isip.
At first, I thought it's not me. I mean, seriously. I had my hair in its natural mess of a condition since birth and never once did it undergo any major fix. And then this one... hahaha! It was really surprising considering that I hate it when people notice that there's something new in me. I prefer to stay out of the limelight.I even hate it when I have to trim my hair when it gets out of control. Oh well...maybe they wont notice the difference. Or if they did... I could always throw a "shinampoo ko lang yan"-line...

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 11:10 AM | 0 comments


7.19.2005
| changes |


From work and back
From the crib then the rocking chair.
From a child to a lady.
From home to nowhereland.
From smile to tears.
From love then hate.
From hate to angst.
From enjoying something to getting sick of it.
From traffic to being late then going home.
From one manager to another.
From a long lost friend to a new found acquaintance.
From having you around then leaving for home.
From hugs and kisses to daydreams.
From sleeping to sleeping some more.
From summer to floods.
From the crazy world of the internet to the world of books and magic.
From happy meal toys to sweet chocolates.
From a month to a year.
From now until forever.
This is my life.
From start to end.

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 10:57 AM | 0 comments


7.11.2005
| waking up |

its the best part.
those once-a-week mornings when the first thing i see is your face
and the first thing i feel are your arms around me.

by Elizabeth Barrett Browning (1806-1861)

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.I love thee to the depth and breadth and

heightMy soul can reach, when feeling out of sightFor the ends of Being and ideal Grace.I love

thee to the level of everyday'sMost quiet need, by sun and candle-light.I love thee freely, as

men strive for Right;I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.I love thee with a passion put

to useIn my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.I love thee with a love I seemed to

loseWith my lost saints, --- I love thee with the breath,Smiles, tears, of all my life! --- and, if

God choose,I shall but love thee better after death."

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 10:51 AM | 0 comments


7.10.2005
| missing those |

I miss them.

the smiling people who greets me each morning

the silence of my seatmate that I grew fond of.

the arrogance of the one I hate

the sound of the CAT and going in the darkness of CATlab.

I miss that.

I miss my boss' shriek of laughter

and my pal's morning anecdotes.

I miss the pantry and that old canteen.

Even the loudness of the front desk.

I miss the untidy pedestal i kept

and the testcards usually in my pocket.

the thrill of violating the no-outside-mail policy.

and the beurucracy for the requests.

I miss those paperworks.

my pets on the desk.

i miss inay.

and everyone i love whom i left.

thier jokes.
the laughter.
the wave.
the camaraderie.

i'm sad. i didnt expect to be.

grays|*mumbles to herself* | 10:22 AM | 0 comments


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